Try and beat this Halloween Costume...
Just moments ago, Cthulhu was reported as destroying many small towns on the east Virginia coast. This all happened when NASA contracted rocket exploded right after launch. Some how this event sent a shockwave far enough to waken Cthulhu. Cthulhu of course is our lord and savior and we should all be thanking NASA for waking him. With is awakening comes the death of all life on earth allowing us to move to a higher level. I hope to see you all there. LONG LIVE CTHULHU!
almarts online store, walmart.com is one of the larget retailers of Halloween costumes. They even have a section labeled "Fat-Girl costumes". This of course was a mistake and was taken down only hours later; that day Walmart apologized with a tweet stating, This never should have been on our site. It is unacceptable, and we apologize. We are working to remove it as soon as possible and ensure this never happens again..."
A LA-London flight was delayed for serveral hours today because of a wifi netowkr nearby. This was not any network, it was a network named "Al-Quida Free Terror Network". A passenger alerted the American Airlines airplane crew, they further relayed the message to police. After a miserable, long investigation lasting several hours, police found no evidence of any crime. The flight from LA to London on Sunday was eventually rescheduled for Monday.
Yesterday, the nation was shocked when the news that the vice president, Joe Biden, has been quarantined. It is speculated that he is infected with the ever spreading ebola virus, but there is no word yet on wether this is true or not. But us here at Phabo asked around and did get an official quote stating that he is in fact is infected with ebola, which he contracted from a recess monkey bite, which he obtained at an OutBack Stake house where he was kissing babies for the crowd. It turned out that one of the crazed women there replaced her child with a recess monkey already infected with ebola in hopes of infecting the vice president. As we can see now her plan looks as if it worked. We will get back to you as these events unfold.